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The new George Clooney movie Up in the Air depicts the life of Ryan Bingham, a hotshot corporate downsizing expert who travels from location to location, acquiring all kinds of airline miles doing the dirty deed that others would prefer not to do; he fires corporate executives.  He is obsessed with efficiency in getting the job done and summarily moving on, unburdened by any semblance of human emotion or concern for the impact of his actions.

He sees the accumulation of airline miles as the highest manifestation of success and life achievement.  This sad soul has forfeited connections with family and significant relationships for a sterile, unburdened life.

As a motivational speaker, he encourages us to let go of what we carry around in our metaphorical backpacks; the things weve acquired and the relationships for which we feel responsible need to be released.  All this attachment, he proclaims, slows us down  and hinders our ability to become the stealth shark at the top of the feeding chain, the most exalted position  a person can reach, according to him. Its all presented quite persuasively.

It was a surprise to me, as well as many others with whom I discussed the movie, that this film is being presented as a comedy.  I found it to be  profound commentary on our time, an early 21st century snapshot of an unpredictable economy, and the trail of human misery it leaves in its wake. Over and over again, we witness grown men and women, who have played by the rules, done all the right things, and have acted with trust and loyalty–only to find themselves reeling in anguish  and despair as they confront a new, surreal, world.  Their new realities are unemployment, loss of health benefits, and an even more pervasive loss of identity.  This gut-wrenching drama is being played out every day, by all types of employees, laborers, manufacturers and executives.

Binghams modicum  of encouragement came with the repeated mantra that all the answers to your questions can be found in the packet.  This was the solace repeated over and over to the poor person who was being rendered redundant. Handing over the all inclusive packet was yet another way for this corporate surgeon to distance himself from the experiences being felt by his victims.

I have since found out, not to my surprise, that the people in the movie were real people who had recently experienced corporate layoff: this explains why the feelings expressed in their faces were so realistically painful.  Bingham, with artificially infused empathy, would remind these folks that this could be a pivotal point that could change their lives for the better.  Of course, the idea that transitions in life can be potentially transformational is certainly not new, and definitely not foreign to me as a psychologist and a career coach.  Life crises can catalyze huge changes that can land us in far better places.  After all, its human natures resistance to risk that threatens to disrupt the status quo.

So, why do I cringe in hearing this sentiment from Bingham?  Its that phony facade revealing a lack of true empathy and feels like an icy blow making a mockery of redirection and redefinition.  Instead of offering encouragement and belief, his message evokes anger and creates obstacles that make it more immobilizing and difficult for the newly redundant  to move forward into a new adventure.  At the very least, people who are subjected to this kind of rupture,  are entitled to genuine connection as they are forced to encounter the most primitive feelings of fear, as their very essence of survival comes into question.  That reverberating sense of what am I going to do now? … repeating over and over again like a surrealistic dreamlike echo.

With the employment rate hovering at 10 %, and jobs evaporating with no clear signs they will be coming back any time soon, we have to shift our thinking and focus.  I believe that people need to inoculate themselves against the co-dependent drama that takes place in the traditional relationship between employer and employee. This is a relationship that we have all grown to expect as the norm.  If I do what I am supposed to do; if I am loyal and a team player , the reciprocal reward from my employer will be to offer me the opportunity for safety, security and growth.  That covenant  is no longer the case, hence the anguish you see in the eyes of those terminated.  They are in shock….I didn’t do anything wrong and this is happening to me.  We are living through times in which this relationship is changing, along with a lot of givens we presume will work for our private pursuit of success.  We are the generation that has to define the new paradigm, a paradigm that leverages  todays realities!

Right now, as we face seemingly catastrophic changes in our world, our focus can become more independent and autonomous.  The advent of a smaller more accessible world  through the world wide web, and increased advances in technology, provides an unlimited audience for anyone to demonstrate their gifts and talents by providing an unprecedented platform for creative expression.  There is potential opportunity for even greater wealth despite some initial pain.  This is a clear example of the pie getting bigger; it is the way in which abundance unfolds.  Reinventing and creating new resources requires a new process of learning.  One focused on developing emotional qualities, as human beings, acknowledging and nurturing our authentic talents, and discovering cooperative partnerships.  I will not be so smug as to think we have all the answers, or that the solutions are simple.  In any creative endeavor, more questions will be raised than answered; this is not necessarily a bad thing.   Positive changes are occurring and communities and networks are forming to co-create new learning environments, forums for creative contributions from the masses not just the elite.  We now live in a world where you don’t necessarily need to have connections,  you actually can just  choose to be connected.

I’ll be sharing more thoughts on the changing world of work as we witness its transformation from adolescence to adulthood.  I invite and welcome your personal stories about job loss terror and re-creation.  I hope none of you hold onto the feeling  of being redundant.  My objective is  help replace that feeling with a voice that expresses potential that continues to be defined and fine tuned.

So, please share with me and my readers your journeys, your stories, experiences and insights; what personal characteristics and circumstances pulled you through turmoil and helped you discover a more rewarding life.  We all have the wisdom and ability to help one another.  I look at this blog as a place where people can come for affirmation and hope. A place where  we can mine for the diamonds that lie hidden in each of us;  where those who have already discovered what worked for them can share  with others who are still searching to find their gems.  Stories that unravel unexpected outcomes give hope for those still caught in the fog, and makes the difference in continuing to move from strive to thrive. Please bring your energy, insight and ideas as we move through this unchartered territory.  Together we will prove Mr. Bingham  wrong.  What we put in our backpacks are meaningful connections, relationships that tie our commonality together and build a strength that can only be achieved through contribution and being part of a supportive, caring community.  Together we can really make the pie bigger!

Thanks to Chris Scholle at Social SAM for making me aware of a new movement via Twitter:  Conscious Capitalism . The movement was launched with a conference on October 20-23 of this year. They say the reason they are launching this movement is:

What a thrill is was for me to read these words!

Our intention in developing the IAM movement is to transform the way we work and live so that everyone can be their best.  The basis of our work, the starting point of every product or service we offer, the point we revisit over and over again, is to bring people back to their “essential best.” We define “essential best” as the awake, infinite, abundant, expanding, conscious part of each of us.

The reason we landed with this approach for the IAM body of work can best be explained by the Einstein quote: “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” I’ve also seen this quote where ‘thinking’ was replaced with ‘consciousness.’ Another way of looking at what Einstein was saying: there is nothing more important to address than the evolution or transformation of our consciousness if we are going to work and live in ways that move beyond the problems or struggles we experience (what we like to call drama!)

What I know is that Conscious Capitalism requires individuals that see the transformation of their individual awareness as the first priority of anything they do, whether in business or their family life. This very personal process of evolving awareness is necessary for Conscious Capitalism to be different than traditional capitalism, otherwise we will be recreating the same problems that currently exist, as Einstein so poignantly described.

Our contribution to Conscious Capitalism includes use of the IAM Maps: the Essence Map (a map of consciousness), the Energy Map (a guide to dynamic self knowledge and understanding energy flow) and the Navigational Compass (a way of navigating through personal development and business development – which links individual internal conscious to external practical realities).

Some of the key aspects of IAM movement that contribute to the Conscious Capitalism movement:

• Start with individual consciousness first: Group, societal and environmental factors are important and change begins within. As within, so without. Individual consciousness is needed to embody evolving conscious leadership.
• Anchor in abundance based thinking: Scarcity thinking is the root of all conflict. Teaching and practicing “both/and” thinking is required for foundational and incremental conscious action that will benefit the whole, rather than being reductionist and benefiting a few. Abundance based thinking is essential if we are to experience mutual exchange of value and mutual benefit.
• Develop awareness of self as energy: Without the ability to separate our awareness of self  from physical realities, shifting to awareness of ’self as energy’,  it is impossible to participate in the transformation of capitalism to conscious forms. Until we shift our focus from drama to our essential best (energy self), alignment of our efforts will only create more drama, recreating old patterns, instead of aligning our values, strengths and passions to create new realities.
• Connect personal and business: Business can not become conscious if people do not bring their whole, evolving, conscious selves to work. Personal growth is required for business growth, and we need language, concepts and maps for making these connections concrete and practical.
• Connect to nature: Being reductionist and overly profit driven has caused people and businesses to become disconnected from the natural rhythms of life, living and indeed the environment. Ways to connect to nature are critical in remembering our wholeness, in re-establishing a healthy relationship with our planet and in generating financial prosperity.
• Address defense mechanisms: Until we can consciously and actively participate as a collective in healing from defensive patterns, we will not be able to fully participate in the sharing of information and resources. Full transparency and openness in our processes requires the ability to ‘love our way through’ our patterns of separation.

There are many aspects of both IAM and Conscious Capitalism that we have yet to discover. Yet if you look at these aspects here, we have a solid foundation to start with! The IAM body of work quickly and easily helps people work with the capabilities I have described here.

There are more aspects of IAM that contribute to Conscious Capitalism, and I’ll continue to add to this list. For those of you who are familiar with IAM, help me draw the connection between the work we are doing and what you would like to see Conscious Capitalism be. Let’s participate NOW in carrying both of these movements forward!

I tend to attract clients who are ready, really ready, to change and influence how work gets done. They see how being unhappy in a job is detrimental to themselves and a business. They see how the surplus of chaos and stupidity in organizations has got to change. They are reluctant to participate in ‘business as usual.’

My clients include newly liberated free spirits (laid off people) who would do just about anything to not contribute to business as usual. Or people who are currently employed who have woken up to the reality that ‘business as usual’ is failing and they are proactively interviewing for new jobs or exploring startup options.

These folks are determined to contribute to a more evolved way of working and conducting business, for themselves and society. They are people who typically have the resources to take time to rethink how they’ve been working and are motivated to create better ways not just for themselves but also for generations to come. They are not going back to the way things have been!

Imagine these same folks interviewing for jobs with people who don’t get it, folks who are blindly ’sheep walking’  thinking the dinosaur they work for is still strong. I could focus on these businesses – how to attract top talent, how to survive in a radically changing economy, but I’ll leave that for another post!

Given how these interviews with sheep walkers are going, my enlightened clients are discouraged, wondering how to proceed, and asking ’should I look for a job or start a new business?’

My advice to these folks, initially, is to proceed as if the job or the business startup were one and the same. In both cases you start with the following questions:

• What is the work that will most fully leverage my essential best?
• What am I passionate about creating or contributing to in the world?

By flushing out the first question, you determine how you can best create value for others – eventually matching your gifts with a compelling need that people have.

By considering the second question, you determine the markets, areas of industry, and business you would target, either in a job search or business startup.

I have heard that outplacement firms are advising folks to consider what companies they want to work for. This is a nice idea, a start to considering what you want. But it doesn’t take things far enough for my clients. It leaves these questions hanging:

• How do I make sure that my next job or work is not business as usual?
• How can the next stage of my career contribute to creating more visionary, evolved, effective, dynamic ways of working?

These are practical questions that, when carefully considered, will put you at the leading edge of the job seeking, business creating crowd – moving toward work that will be viable and sustainable in the future. These questions help you bypass or pull yourself out of the dying cycle of ‘finding that job or startup that pays the bills but is in a dying dinosaur business that will just lead to another layoff or struggle in a short amount of time …’

These are not questions that should land you in a dark corner, meditating on your navel, afraid to venture out into a scary world where people are still in a stupor or where uncertainty creates confusion.

Instead, these questions lead to the adventure of  explorative conversations with people about the unknown, or the chaos of our times … from which you can see new needs that uniquely match your gifts, perspective and vision … or from which new opportunities or order emerges.

I recommend a tight cycle of personal reflection/journaling/learning and venturing out to talk with people about what’s needed, what’s possible, what’s inspiring. Back and forth between reflection and action, that eventually leads to finding jobs or creating business that often didn’t exist before.

Some examples, based on personal and client experience:

• coach and consultant with background in technology, business and organizational change leverages new developments in social media and networking to contribute to the evolution in consciousness and business (that’s me!)
• technology marketing specialist participates in a startup business bringing a new, locally sourced bio-fuel to market as an alternative to petroleum diesel
• ICU nurse with MBA creates new job/startup helping doctors evolve their businesses so they can bypass insurance companies
• artist, knowledge management expert, change leader combines radically diverse gifts to move work toward business startup using artistic talents to capture learning and tell stories of successful change efforts, that will be used to inspire and guide new change efforts

From these examples, you can see people uniquely combining their gifts and experiences to meet a current need while also participating in creating a world they want to see emerge. The way forward demands ‘business as un-usual!’ And your strategy could include a job or startup, depending on what you bring, the need you are meeting, and the future you want to create both for yourself and for the world.

So what’s the next step for you?

I recently talked with a member of our IAM Learning Community about what direction he might take his work. So many possibilities! So little experience discerning what he really wants! One of his biggest challenges is simply knowing where to focus.

If you think about it, ‘too many choices’ would be a common challenge when connecting to the abundant, infinite space of our essential selves – what we like to call our essential best. When you break free of external limitations, when you realize that anything really is possible, the buffet table of options can be vast.

Except that the choices that are right for us are not infinite. What was interesting in this conversation was hearing how this person, like so many of us, was looking for ‘opportunities to be creative’. This is also a marker of transforming your work and life so that you can be your best: creativity becomes key. In looking for ”opportunities to be creative’, my friend identified what I like to call ‘the delay factor’: when creativity and joy is a destination, not an integral part of our choice making, a tool we can use to narrow our focus and prioritize our options.

Creating work and life that reflects our best selves happens when we start from creativity and joy:

• What brings you joy right now in this very moment?
• If your creativity was an energetic fuel that wants to move through you, what’s first thing you would do now?

When we tune into our joy and creativity now, we hone our ability to know what we want and make the choices that will create the future we really want. The wrong job or the poor business deal didn’t happen when things went wrong; it happened back in the beginning when we were unclear about our joy and creativity.

A friend of mine says that we vote every day. How true this is! We don’t create the results we experience in a singular event like an election. We create results every step of the way – in ways we participate in every day life.

The dark side of the ‘delay factor’ is the source of this pattern of thinking. Where does it come from? Many religious traditions have misinterpreted sacred teaching to go something like this: “if you are good, then, and only then, you’ll go to heaven.” I’m not interested in whether this idea is right or wrong. I AM interested in what this thinking does to people: “if you are good” is typically determined by some rule or dogma we are supposed to follow.

The thing I have an issue with is how these religions ideas have permeated society and created generations of us who have given our power to others who determine ‘what is good for us’. Heaven later instead of heaven now in the form of joy and creativity is the source of the delay factor. It is also the source of most oppression and persecution in the world.

So snapping out of patterns of delay become critical in several ways:

• It’s key narrowing focus and choice that leads to the right work and life for us: real success
• It contributes to a societal shift away from oppression to empowerment

Are you ready for joy and creativity now? Are you ready for heaven on earth here and now? Does it sound crazy to think about joy and heaven right now, this very instant? What ‘yea buts’ come to mind?

Curious about what you think …

I found this on the internet and thought it was perfect for how I would describe the IAM Learning Community. It’s a quote by Jack Kerouac in an Apple Computer ad, 1997.

Here’s to the Crazy Ones

Here’s to the crazy ones.
The misfits. The rebels.
The troublemakers. The round
pegs in the square holes – the
ones who see things differently.
They’re not fond of rules and
they have no respect for
the status quo. You can praise
them, disagree with them,
quote them, disbelieve them,
glorify or vilify them.
About the only thing that you
can’t do is ignore them.
Because they change things.

Cheers to us! Cheers to you! … All the crazy ones who are tired of the status quo!

What’s more insane than the conflicts we see between nations and individuals? Wherever conflict arises, whether in our local families or nation communities, there is one simple solution to struggle of any kind: caring for ourselves.

How could conflict resolution be so simple? An example: the socially liberal daughter and the financially conservative father whose conflicting views have made it impossible for them to enjoy each other.

Conflict exists only when we find ourselves in either/or situations: either her liberal views or his conservative ones. Either/or situations happen when we see our family or community as too small to include our views (or needs).

It’s very tempting to blame the community when either/or situations happen: “I don’t fit in this family or ‘this group’ won’t accept my views.” True enough – this happens! Yet we now know without a doubt that the world is big enough for each of us to find a place where our views belong. Somewhere!

We create impossible situations when honoring of our views is dependent on “the other” person or community. Conflict is inevitable if the daughter’s liberal views are honored only if the father agrees and vice versa.

The trick to getting past this dependence on ‘the other’ is for us to care for or love ourselves enough to find that space and place of acceptance and love within. Once we love on the inside, the outside comes easily. We create communities that love our views.

What often happens is that the daughter’s liberal views are respected by the father once she no longer needs her father to agree – when the daughter belongs to a community where her views are appreciated. Once we experience respect for our views – we are free to confidently and productively explore our differences.

Making self-care a priority, practicing relentless self love creates situations where delight in our differences is possible. Limiting our expectations to the co-existence of diverse views implies toleration of ‘the other’.

What I want is delight in ‘the other’. What are the fathers’ conservative concerns and why?

I can only listen deeply to and enjoy the gifts of a radically different view if I confidently love myself and am willing to stretch …

All it takes is for one person to practice self-love and stretch, for delight in the views of “the other” to be experienced. From that one person loving, a family can love. If a family can love, a community can love. If a community can love, a nation can love and end conflict with its enemies….

Ending the insanity of conflict between nations will come from one person having the courage to ‘love thine enemy’. Which takes loving myself. Really, it’s as simple as that.

So can you imagine ending conflict being as simple as self-love? What are the “yea, buts” that come to mind?

When I first read the topic for this month’s newsletter, Caring for Myself, I immediately thought of spa days, mani-pedis, Sunday afternoon naps, and long vacations. Although there’s certainly nothing wrong with those ways of taking care of myself, I believe that taking care of myself involves a lot more.

I recently had a conversation with someone who felt she really couldn’t have what she wanted because it would be too selfish. That got me to thinking, what is selfish? And what is the opposite of selfish? Naturally I went to the dictionary to look up the definition of the words. Here’s what I found:

Selfish. Devoted to or caring for only one’s self; concerned primarily with one’s own interests, benefits, welfare. We know these people – they are called narcissists. “Maria has been hoarding food for the past year, just in case something happens to the economy and she won’t have enough to eat.”

Selfless. Little or no concern for oneself. We know these people – they are called martyrs. “Antonio wouldn’t dare apply for a promotion. His boss really needs him to stay where he is because he is so valuable, so he’ll just stay put.”

Somewhere in between selfishness and selflessness is caring for ourselves, a glorious place where we get what we want and others get what they want as well. It’s a place of healing, growth, and love, starting with ourselves first.

What happens when we don’t care for ourselves and only give of ourselves? Depression, addiction, despair, anger, sadness, emptiness, negativity, and fearful thinking are all results of not taking care of ourselves or diminishing ourselves in service to others.

When I care for myself, I trust myself, express myself fully and authentically, love myself just as I am, and embrace my healing while also inviting others to do the same. What I am learning is that that there is plenty of room for caring for myself and caring for others. It doesn’t have to be one or the other – polarizing views of caring only for ourselves or caring only for others is a sure fire way to keep all of us on different paths with little ways of connecting with each other.

How would your life change if you found that glorious place inside yourself that has been crying out for acknowledgment? What polarizing views do you have about caring for yourself that have been limiting your healing or growth and/or the growth of others?

I’d love to hear from you!

What are transformational goals?

Transformational goals not only have a direction and destination in mind, they create experiences for people to grow and evolve by stepping into a higher version of who they are.

Five critical factors that support achieving transformational goals:

1. Passion Our passions motivate and inspire us to take action. Without passion our life can become mechanical and empty. Deep desire can give us the courage to take life –changing risks with determination and power in the face of fears and uncertainty.
2. Fulfilling Your Life/Soul Purpose Having a sense of why we are here and what we are here to do gives meaning to our life. Making choices with a sense of purpose helps us to regain perspective when we feel confused, doubt, and fear. Our purpose reminds us of who we are when we slip into the dramas and details of our life.
3. Solid Support and Accountability Surrounding yourself with people who can be objective, uplifting, encouraging, and forthright to cheer you on, challenge you to be great, kick you in the butt when you’re stalling, help you stand strong when facing fear, remind you of who you are when you forget, and hold you accountable to your purpose, passions, and vision makes a huge difference in going the distance and achieving success.
4. Have a Strong Self-Care Regime Think of taking care of your body, mind, and spirit as an important element to your inner foundation. When we feel “fed” we can show up for the people, responsibilities and situations that we most care about with our best SELF. When we are depleted, over-extended, hungry, lonely, or angry, life becomes more burdensome. To check when you might be out of balance or in need of some self-care pronto, here are some common signals: taking things too personally, beating yourself up, irritability, over-reacting, resentment, anger, overwhelm, confusion, distracted, stressed, or tense. Ask yourself, “What do I need right now? What is my body asking for? What have I been ignoring?“ Then DO IT!
5. Taking Inspired Action Listening to and following your gut instinct and intuition to guide your choices and actions can bring amazing opportunities into your life. It takes courage to take leaps of faith when we are motivated by fear. Inspiration comes from within; from our Divine “inner knowing” urging us to step into the unknown with faith and trust, often without a safety net. Our mind is an instrument with the ability to reason and assess situations that support us in making logical, sound choices that can motivate us to action when things makes sense.

Self-care is foundational to each of these factors in achieving transformational goals. Why settle for anything less than goals that inspire your personal evolution? And the self-care needed to transform?

Like most things, whether we practice self-care isn’t reeeeeeally about self-care. We all know that exercise, balanced eating, reading books and napping when our bodies ask us to is good for us and feels great. So what gets in the way of us making space for this blissful existence??

I have clients who talk about taking time to read or go for a walk regularly as if it’s A) a lovely thought, but a pipe dream akin to winning the lottery because there’s just too much else to do B) something that would cause their families (and possibly the whole world!) to completely fall apart since they wouldn’t be there to hold it all together C) just flat-out selfish!

For most of us, there’s a dash of one or all of those flavors that holds us back from putting our wants and needs first or even equal to other people and priorities.

Two of my favorite books that peel back the layers on what’s really going on are The Power of Full Engagement and I Used to Have a Handle on Life But It Broke…Six Power Solutions for Women with Too Much to Do (there’s good stuff in the latter for the guys too!).

Both books demonstrate that a fulfilling, joyful, engaged life is created when we stop trying to ‘keep up’, control, and push through, none of which are natural or productive. We become fully engaged (and best able to contribute to the rest of the world!) when we manage our energy first (an infinite resource) vs. our time (a finite resource).

Did you know that our bodies and brains follow a rhythm that’s based on a 90-120 minute cycle? That if we take mini-breaks in our attention, focus, and physical space based on that cycle that we greatly and immediately increase our energy, creativity, and productivity? It’s so logical, yet many of us still struggle with allowing ourselves to create the mini-breaks – let alone the big breaks!

Power Solutions:

• Micro-actions: Commit to something so small that it’s impossible not to do (read for just 1 minute before bed, get dressed to exercise – no exercise, just getting dressed, lay down for a 3 minute nap). Micro-actions move us from the wish, I want to do this, to the action, I can do this.
• Purpose: Spend some time getting in touch with what you really want – the more you care for yourself, the better able you can fulfill this purpose.
• Rituals: Discipline and will typically aren’t strong enough to overcome our underlying resistance to things like self-care. Create daily rituals that become as natural to you as brushing your teeth.

Take Action: What’s one micro-action you can take right now? What ritual can you commit to for a few days? (then another few days, then another, then another…!)

Have you ever felt like there are almost TOO many options to choose from when it comes to what you want? That the hardest part of getting it can be figuring out what “it” is??

I find it both liberating AND scary to think about what I want. After all, moving toward something can mean leaving the comfy and familiar behind, and what happens if I want something with my heart and soul and it doesn’t happen?? Could it be better to just not want to begin with??

Whew…that either/or scarcity thinking is exhausting! I know from experience…lately I’ve been under a smothering cloud of tension about what I want compared to the comfort of how things have been.

There’s nothing like the joy of falling in love with a man that you want to spend your life with! And there’s nothing like the cloud of tension I’ve felt about life as my daughter and I have known it for 9 years changing when we blend families! Toss in the start of a new business from home, the daughter being a tween, and well…it’s been a little ugly (and funny when I have perspective!).

How do you move from scarcity thinking to abundance about what you want?

For me, the shift happened this morning. I was frankly tired of the drama and crying (which was useful for a little while!) and simply made a choice to return to abundance.

What impact did that choice have? I got up to go for a run (which I felt too tired for when mired in the drama). Running is magic for me when it comes to getting perspective and energy. What is magic for you??

Before I left I was browsing an old Oprah magazine. I read an article about a Leadership Summit for ‘regular’ women who’d won a contest to bring forth their humanitarian ideas and get support for moving them forward. In abundance mode, I noticed which stories inspired me most and what I want with my own work if I could have it any way at all. I have several ideas I can’t wait to follow up on!

And – ideas for this article just hadn’t been able to get through the smothering cloud of tension. As I joyfully ran, getting out of my own way, ideas tumbled in…

I still don’t know what blended family life will look like, but I’m remembering that I always get what I want or something better!

What helps you move from fear of change to risking what you really want?